"The force of habit" by Thomas Bernhard - On campus performance of the Universitas Negeri Yogyakarta, Indonesiaby Michaela Nocker
Failure in France and Germany often has to do with guilt. In the US, being daring means being. Those who fail young here, however, did not succeed in getting themselves on the right track. If you fail in the USA, you started to find your own way early on. Ultimately, this problem makes one thing clear: We attach too much importance to the mind - and the diplomas that sanction the triumph of the mind over the experience. As children of Plato and Descartes, we are too much of a rationalist and not an empiricist. It is no coincidence that most of the empiric philosophers come from the Anglo-Saxon world: John Locke, David Hume, Ralph Waldo Emerson ... In essence, David Hume said: We know from experience what we know about the world. And the American Emerson a good century later: "Life is an experiment. The more experiences you do, the better. " The experience of failure is the immediate experience of life itself. We often experience dizziness as a state of limbo. Admittedly, he does not let himself be "caught". In the case of failure, on the other hand, we encounter a reality that we did not know before and that offends us. Is not true life that which surprises us, tears with us and can not be explained by any theory? The sooner we fail, the sooner we question life. If you look at Marcel Proust's manuscripts, especially his novel À l'ombre des jeunes filles en fleurs, which is kept in the Bibliothèque nationale de France, it is teeming with deletions and corrections, with changed and rearranged sentences. It is clear that some of him only came after several failed attempts. The most beautiful passages did not immediately flow from his pen. He had to miss until it was finally good. Samuel Beckett probably wanted to say just that when he wrote, "Fail again. Fail better. "This was his definition of the artistic profession - and it is also the secret of a fulfilled life. The professional tennis player Stan Warinka, winner of the French Open 2015 and the Australian Open and the Monte-Carlo Rolex Masters 2014, has apparently understood this, because he let the whole passage from Samuel Becketts Worstward. On the worst to tattoo in the original on the left forearm: "Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better. "-"When asked why he did that, his response was that Samuel Beckett's words had always worn him, and besides, there was no better message of hope. If the failure occurs, it is beyond our power. In our power lies only our way of life. We can moan about our "unjust" fate. Or embrace failure as a chance for an encounter with reality, as a way of becoming a better stoic every day. Before J. K. Rowling began writing to Harry Potter - her name was Joanne Rowling at that time - she had experienced two defeats at once, both professionally and privately. Her husband had left her, and she had lost her job with Amnesty, so she suddenly stood without income and alone with her little daughter. Without the help of her sister, who took her in, she would have landed on the street. Dull of the terrible feeling of a completely botched life, she had reached the Tiepoint. But as she told long after the sensational success of Harry Potter's adventures, "The low point is the solid foundation upon which I have built my life." In that first life, she had to neglect her literary vocation due to her professional and family responsibilities. Only sporadically, she allowed herself some time for this, usually at lunchtime, between two sessions. At some point she began to look at her failure with a different eye and to see her as an opportunity to change her life. It was not easy. She had no money for the kindergarten and could only write if her daughter slept, in the afternoon and at night. The Edinburgh pubs became accustomed to the sight of the young, tired-faced mother scribbling notebooks while the daughter slept in the stroller beside her. At the Elephant House, where she regularly went to write, the regulars believed that she had no heating at home and therefore worked here. Her mother had died of multiple sclerosis shortly before her divorce. Her protagonist pushed itself on its own: a young sorcerer's apprentice who suffered from his parents' death. When the book was ready, she sent the first chapters to an agent who sent them back by return mail. She found another agent, but they had to take a dozen cancellations. When her book was finally published, and it was known to have been sensationally successful, she realized that what she had first thought was a fearful defeat had led her on a path more in keeping with her nature. A path from which she had actually distracted her first seemingly successful life. Throughout his work, Sigmund Freud warns us of the negative consequences of over-identification - with the mother, with the father, with the totalitarian head of state, or with personal failure. Anyone who identifies too long with his parents forbids himself to grow and likes regression. A child develops because it changes its identification figure from time to time. Only with this "game" does it learn to say "I" and to test its uniqueness. Anyone who identifies with a totalitarian head of state like Hitler or Stalin follows his Weltanschauung or delusions, switches off his critical consciousness and runs the risk of complicity in the most gruesome crimes. Anyone who identifies with his failure devalues himself and sooner or later sinks into shame or self-abasement. Every identification has a morbid side and is a fixation. Here life is movement. This heraclitic wisdom falls into oblivion when we focus on our failure. In order to live better with the failure, we should begin to redefine it.
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